How to Coach Your Nanny Through Child Behavior Challenges

Even the best-behaved kids have tough days. When challenging behaviors pop up—tantrums, defiance, hitting—it’s important to approach the solution as a team. Your nanny needs your support, just like your child needs consistency.

Start with open conversation. Ask your nanny how they’re handling the behavior and what they’ve noticed. Is it tied to tiredness? Transitions? Hunger? Compare notes on what works for you—timeouts, redirection, calm-down corners—and agree on shared language and strategies.

For example, instead of “stop,” try “let’s use gentle hands,” or “I see you’re upset, let’s take deep breaths.” When kids hear the same phrasing from both you and your nanny, they’re less confused and more likely to respond positively.

Avoid placing blame. Instead, offer encouragement and a safe space to brainstorm solutions. Check in weekly to adjust your approach if needed.

And remember—some behaviors are developmental, not disciplinary. Your child may be learning boundaries or expressing emotions they can’t yet name. By coaching your nanny with patience and teamwork, you help create a calm, united caregiving environment where everyone can thrive.